Life is hard sometimes. Do you have a list of things that you enjoy? Here's mine:
1. Treating myself to dinner. Thai, sushi, Indian are my favorites.
2. Chocolate custard!!!
3. Having my hair brushed. Disclaimer: paddle brushes are the BEES KNEES.
4. Purchasing/smelling/reading new books
5. Time with friends. We all need em'.
6. Travel.
7. Alone time.
8. Indi films at E Street cinema, mostly alone but companions are always good.
9. Church. Gotta reenergize and rejuvenate
10. BREAKFAST
11. Turkey bacon/sausage at any time of day
12. Surfing the net to find new stuff to like.
13. Listening to NPR. Michelle Norris, Farai Chideya, Audie Cornish, Garrison Keillor and Terry Gross have such attractive voices.
14. Buying new pencils and pens.
15. Journaling
16. Random Mother and Daughter texting
17. Deep convos with my Aunt
18 Having Awesome uncles
19. Daydreaming about owning a home.
20. Driving in my car.
21. Massages
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
10 Random Things I'd Like To Do
1. Have wine with cupcakes 2. Go skydiving 3. Take a wine tasting course 4. Take a cooking class 5. Take a water-coloring class 6. Join a foreign language meet-up group(French, Spanish, or German) 7. Join a meditation meet-up group 8. Visit Mount Kilamanjaro 9. Read a book by Rebecca Walker 10. Get a two hour hot stone massage
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Django Unchained and Bullets In My Cynicism
Quentin Tarantino's latest [genius] cinematic endeavor Django Unchained left audiences, regardless of their ethnic background and racial politics, 'feeling some kind of way' as they exited the theater. Some movie goers (including Oprah) called it cathartic as they made their way through halls choked with folk who weren't studdin' no Bilbo Baggins, and could give less of a damn [no disrespect to Peter Jackson] about his Unexpected Journey. Picture if you can a United States where violence, sexual abuse, and enslavement of Black people was not only typical but essentially American. No, I'm not talking about right now, I'm talking about 1858. Anyway, here you have the primary ingredients of a movie about slavery. But that is where all would be comparisons end, because as opposed to your typical slave flick, the victim-turned-freedman gets the 'get back' most disenfranchised people of color can only dream of.
Moving from cathartic, Django Unchained has been called racist and disrespectful due to it's gratuitous use of the N-word. Now let's be real--the movie takes place two years before the Civil War officially begins, and at the time there were no American words to describe people of African descent. We were neither Africans nor Americans, and we certainly were not human. We were property and that's what "living" property was called. For the sake of time, I'm going to write them off as haters. But there's more still to this film...
Moving from cathartic, Django Unchained has been called racist and disrespectful due to it's gratuitous use of the N-word. Now let's be real--the movie takes place two years before the Civil War officially begins, and at the time there were no American words to describe people of African descent. We were neither Africans nor Americans, and we certainly were not human. We were property and that's what "living" property was called. For the sake of time, I'm going to write them off as haters. But there's more still to this film...
If you went to see Django Unchained and got little more out of it than the killing, and a chance to glimpse any uncomfortable shifting of White audience members you think might be closet racists or simply on a guilt trip, it could be that you've missed the point entirely. It's a love story. No, that's too simple. Django Unchained is a well crafted (though Quentin might not have realized it) weapon against the train wrecked images that come to mind when you think of relationships between Black men and Black women. And yes, the media is in some ways apart of the problem, but we're too smart to blame it all on them. We can't even blame most of it on the media, so let's not go there.
You don't need to look far, or too hard for that matter, to see the less than desirable position we find ourselves in. Simply flip the channel to BET, turn on a movie, surf the web, watch YouTube videos, and you'll see the wreckage. We live in a time in which it's cool to date our tri-joint smoking abusers and be "Unapologetic" about it, and where we happily straighten out "ratchet hoes" one upper cut at a time. The sad thing is that this is not even the tip of the iceberg's tip.
But there's hope. Jamie Foxx and Kerry Washington's characters give a glimpse of a very real and enduring love that need not slip through our fingers. The kind of love that makes you search for you family after chattel slavery has broken it apart on the auction block. Foxx transforms into our very own Black Siegfried and walks through hellfire for his Broomhilde-- and all because knew in his heart that she was worth it. Broomhilde [Kerry Washington] spared no expense giving back that love; she was even with him as he day-dreamed. I suppose, somewhere along the way too many of us had forgotten that we worthy it? Well, thank God for reminders like Tarantino's. There's an authenticity to Foxx's tenderness towards Washington and, more importantly, a sense of duty and purpose [to love his woman] that hasn't been seen in mainstream cinema featuring Black main characters for a decade. That might even be generous of me. There was no room for Tyler Perry-esque cookie cutter "love", no room for the guessing games in the Gangsta flicks. Django lifted my spirits and blasted rounds into my cynicism. The real question is what can we do to obtain that real and devoted love? I reckon we can start within. If that's too cryptic and leaves you completely lost, go see the movie. Hopefully some part of you somewhere will say, "I wanna be loved just like that." I know I do.
Cheers
You don't need to look far, or too hard for that matter, to see the less than desirable position we find ourselves in. Simply flip the channel to BET, turn on a movie, surf the web, watch YouTube videos, and you'll see the wreckage. We live in a time in which it's cool to date our tri-joint smoking abusers and be "Unapologetic" about it, and where we happily straighten out "ratchet hoes" one upper cut at a time. The sad thing is that this is not even the tip of the iceberg's tip.
But there's hope. Jamie Foxx and Kerry Washington's characters give a glimpse of a very real and enduring love that need not slip through our fingers. The kind of love that makes you search for you family after chattel slavery has broken it apart on the auction block. Foxx transforms into our very own Black Siegfried and walks through hellfire for his Broomhilde-- and all because knew in his heart that she was worth it. Broomhilde [Kerry Washington] spared no expense giving back that love; she was even with him as he day-dreamed. I suppose, somewhere along the way too many of us had forgotten that we worthy it? Well, thank God for reminders like Tarantino's. There's an authenticity to Foxx's tenderness towards Washington and, more importantly, a sense of duty and purpose [to love his woman] that hasn't been seen in mainstream cinema featuring Black main characters for a decade. That might even be generous of me. There was no room for Tyler Perry-esque cookie cutter "love", no room for the guessing games in the Gangsta flicks. Django lifted my spirits and blasted rounds into my cynicism. The real question is what can we do to obtain that real and devoted love? I reckon we can start within. If that's too cryptic and leaves you completely lost, go see the movie. Hopefully some part of you somewhere will say, "I wanna be loved just like that." I know I do.
Cheers
Friday, December 21, 2012
My Reading Child
I want my child to love reading. I want him (or her) to crave the smell of a new book and be excited by the prospect of what it contains.
I want my child to digest the books and be so sick with the stuff (s)he's learned that (s)he can' help but spew it onto the next lucky person, inflicting them with the desire to read, and so the cycle continues...
I'm gonna start when baby is in the womb, oh yes! I'm gonna buy those Dr. Dre. headphones, slip them bad-boys onto my belly as soon as the pregnancy test says: POSITIVE, and play books on tape/cd/digital whatever!
However it goes, I want my child to be a better reader than I, with a bigger imagination, and more importantly...a bigger library than mine.
I want my child to digest the books and be so sick with the stuff (s)he's learned that (s)he can' help but spew it onto the next lucky person, inflicting them with the desire to read, and so the cycle continues...
I'm gonna start when baby is in the womb, oh yes! I'm gonna buy those Dr. Dre. headphones, slip them bad-boys onto my belly as soon as the pregnancy test says: POSITIVE, and play books on tape/cd/digital whatever!
However it goes, I want my child to be a better reader than I, with a bigger imagination, and more importantly...a bigger library than mine.
MY DREAM (wait for it...wait for it...)
How Will You Make Your Exit?
There's an expression that says: "People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime." You never really get used to the idea of people being in your life temporarily, but that's how it is. This part of our journey usually sucks, but you can take heart in the fact that sometimes it can be a good thing. Sometimes, people's time [in your life] runs out, there's just no more room for them, and it's better for them to move on. This is about moving on-- but from the perspective of one who is leaving.
Friendship
If it was a relationship with a friend, it's virtually the same as "the talk."
Everything Else
How do we go about making our exit when it's our time to leave? Is there a big to-do? Do we gracefully bow out? Or do we just quietly slip unnoticed out the back door? I suppose that answer depends on the dynamic of the relationship with the person being left.
Love
I suppose if the relationship was of the love persuasion and the well's run dry, it's a good idea to have "the talk." I'm not willing to go too deep into it. Sit down with them, say what you need and then hear what they have to say. Just make sure your bags, both physical and emotional, have been packed.
I suppose if the relationship was of the love persuasion and the well's run dry, it's a good idea to have "the talk." I'm not willing to go too deep into it. Sit down with them, say what you need and then hear what they have to say. Just make sure your bags, both physical and emotional, have been packed.
Friendship
If it was a relationship with a friend, it's virtually the same as "the talk."
Everything Else
Here's where things get complicated[for me]. What to do when you decide that you feel the best way to leave a person, is to sneak out the back door? At first, I thought the idea was cruel and cowardly, but now I'm not so sure. Does closure really require conversation? Do you owe the person an explanation when you feel that getting outta dodge is what's best for you? Relationship dynamics are complicated, and people are even more complicated-er (lol). There are things in between friendship and love, there's stuff that's not even close to either, there's uncertainty, there's one-sidedness, there's the needless, the BS--and then there are exits. I think any of those reasons listed above is a good enough to "slip away" from the perpetrator. Don't get me wrong, there may need to be some thought and consideration when it comes to the Love/Friendship but the EEBS seems to me to be whole 'nother ball game. People are driven to do ridiculous stuff when dealing with the EEBS, but why bother when you can just remove yourself? It removes any complication, (your) hurt feelings, and it sends a message...the EEBS is beneath you, and by the time the perpetrator realizes it, you're already gone. The (considerably lighter) journey continues.
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Poem.
beneath all this dirt is a precious stone
a jewel to be crafted by experience
polished with wisdom
and made to shine in the light
somehow
a jewel to be crafted by experience
polished with wisdom
and made to shine in the light
somehow
world's worst black girl does pin-curl (badly)
"Ever girl should know how to fix her goddamn hair..."
But I don't.
I typically opt to let the stylists at Bubbles Hair Salon, trusted homegirls, and sometimes a small group of Seniors at the school where I work, fix my mop. I'm not too sure why the hands that I was born with, lack the 'magic touch' when it comes to styling my own hair but excel when it comes to other things like, shelf-reading, typing, texting, and pulling brand new books from bookstore/library shelves.
Last month I'd visited Bubbles to get my hair washed and styled in order to attend my school's prom (as a chaperone). My typical hairstyle is curls via flat-iron. Sammi, my hairstyle goddess, did a bomb-azz job, as she always does--but the real task is upkeep. After hours of monitoring well-dressed teenagers dance, cry, take pictures, and mistake me for a fellow student, my curls and me head home to the mirror.
"Just follow the curl..."
That's what they tell me when they see I'm clearly daunted by the idea of pin-curling my own hair. I stand in front of the mirror and set to work, dividing my curls into sections and trying to follow the directions to ensure that they're safely fastened by my hair pins. On and on I go until all of my hair is pinned up into what, in my view, could been seen as an interesting-looking hair situation. With bonnet in place, I hope under the blanket and drift off to sleep.
The morning after...
After dragging myself out of my bed to get washed up and church ready, I pull off my bonnet and loose my hair from the pins. And what do I get? Weird ringlets that look little to nothing like the practiced works of art my girls can do. DRAT!!!
Back to the drawing board...or the hairstylist.
But I don't.
I typically opt to let the stylists at Bubbles Hair Salon, trusted homegirls, and sometimes a small group of Seniors at the school where I work, fix my mop. I'm not too sure why the hands that I was born with, lack the 'magic touch' when it comes to styling my own hair but excel when it comes to other things like, shelf-reading, typing, texting, and pulling brand new books from bookstore/library shelves.
Last month I'd visited Bubbles to get my hair washed and styled in order to attend my school's prom (as a chaperone). My typical hairstyle is curls via flat-iron. Sammi, my hairstyle goddess, did a bomb-azz job, as she always does--but the real task is upkeep. After hours of monitoring well-dressed teenagers dance, cry, take pictures, and mistake me for a fellow student, my curls and me head home to the mirror.
"Just follow the curl..."
That's what they tell me when they see I'm clearly daunted by the idea of pin-curling my own hair. I stand in front of the mirror and set to work, dividing my curls into sections and trying to follow the directions to ensure that they're safely fastened by my hair pins. On and on I go until all of my hair is pinned up into what, in my view, could been seen as an interesting-looking hair situation. With bonnet in place, I hope under the blanket and drift off to sleep.
The morning after...
After dragging myself out of my bed to get washed up and church ready, I pull off my bonnet and loose my hair from the pins. And what do I get? Weird ringlets that look little to nothing like the practiced works of art my girls can do. DRAT!!!
Back to the drawing board...or the hairstylist.
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